I’m gonna hunt down 

that damn bat

you know the one,

that filthy winged rodent

causing all this mess —

I’m gonna chase it down

with my butterfly net and 

my lysol spray-gun

and when I catch up to it

I’m gonna strap it to 

a really uncomfortable little chair

and shine my keychain light into its

beady black eyes until it confesses 

to everything.

We have a goddamn right to know —

what possessed you to leave the

dark comfort of your cave,

only to end up in some

poor guy's soup.

Your careless wingflap just caused

a fucking hurricane 

thousands of miles away —

tumbling down 

the entire empire of cards

we've all taken decades to build. 

I mean, how could you be

so blind?